conflicting information.

I am a researching freak.  I read just about everything ... Books, articles online, message boards, etc.  Especially when it comes to infertility, I want to be as knowledgable as possible.

I'm also susceptible to trying anything and everything to make sure this upcoming IVF cycle works.  Obviously there are no guarantees, but I'm one who will fall into the trap of any recommendation or suggestion that something specific will help my chances.  You say eating a pomegranate a day will have me ovulating in no time?  I'll do it.

Part of this approach is that I'm afraid if IVF doesn't work that I will find a way to blame myself.  If I didn't exercise properly in preparation for IVF and it fails, it will be my fault.  If I drank too many glasses of wine during this waiting period and IVF fails, it will be my fault.  If I didn't do acupuncture in the 12 weeks leading up to IVF and it fails, it will be my fault.

Totally irrational, but I know myself.  And that's exactly what I'll do.

So like I've said before, I'm exercising and eating "right" and getting the acupuncture.  I'm not drinking alcohol.  I don't use tobacco or any other drugs.  I've gained a couple of pounds of cushion because a former doctor told me that fat helps with estrogen production.

Maybe it's all ridiculous, maybe it's all for nothing.  But I don't know either way.

So in my quest for all of the information so that I can make informed decisions about my health and well-being during this wait period, I have stumbled across a TON of info.  Maybe even all of the information ... as I intended to find.

The problem is that so much of it is conflicting.  One study suggests women consume full-fat dairy products.  Another says women should stay away from dairy products.  One article says higher IVF pregnancy rates were found in women who took a gluten-free approach.  Other nutritional suggestions say to eat lots of whole grains.  One site will tell you to exercise daily, another will tell you to take it easy.  What the hell?!

My acupuncturist has made diet suggestions based on my specific issues.  She says that because I suffer from blood stagnation (Chinese medicine's diagnosis of an imbalance that causes endometriosis), I should eat warm foods.  They should all be cooked -- no raw vegetables.  I should drink warm drinks.  I should avoid wheat, dairy, and sugar.  I should eat a lot of leafy greens, high-protein foods, and fruits.  Makes sense...

I will gladly do all of that.  But is it true?  What about the studies that claim the opposite?  What if one way is detrimental, but I don't know which way that is?  What if I take the wrong approach?

By now you've all come to the conclusion that I'm a crazy person.  And I am.  But what do I do?  I'm the biggest worrier on the planet, and I have the best intentions.  This is my one shot, and I don't want to blow it.

Do I eat what I want within reason?  Do I allow myself the ice cream?  Do I keep eating pastas and whole grain breads?  Do I ditch the dairy?

(Don't even get me started on all of the meth-heads and processed-food junkies out there who are popping out babies like crazy.)

Ugh.